It's raining. But I know I will see the sun again. Things are dark. The clouds are mounting. There is retreating and refuge. There is a scramble for cover. There are patches of chaos as people pack their things. The sky grows darker. But I know I will see the sun again.
This is my relationship with the Lord. I KNOW he's there, I know he will not forsake me. But I still fear the storm. I still fear the darkness. I KNOW he will get me through it. But I ask, how long. How long will you leave me here? How long will it pour? How long must I take refuge in this damp place, void of light. How long must I wait? Knowing it will pass is not enough for me. I need dates, times - I need details. But why? I need to trust HIM and knowing the exact route won't save me. He will save me. He wants me looking to him, not my watch or calendar.
This analogy translates anywhere but it really gets me here during rainy season. The fact that I get to live in a place that has a "rainy season" should be reason to rejoice honestly. It's beautiful. Sure, it gets sloppy and I get stuck places on my bike. I've been soaked to my core countless times. But, the rain is powerful and healthy and a reminder of God's provision. It's rain or death here for lots of people so it's kinda of a big deal. I have learned to love it. I look forward to it. I get stuck just watching massive sheets pour across the lawn. I love watching it sweep in from the mountains and slowly cover town. I love the minute that people feel rain drops. It's like a switch, things are packed, cars and bikes are moved, cover is taken. And then the wait. We know the sun will be back. But we have to wait.
I don't really know what I'm being taught until I look on it. I don't really know what decisions are being influenced until I backtrack. I don't hear an audible voice from the almighty, he doesn't send me perfect visions or undeniable signs. He nudges my heart. In a very subtle but effective way. He uses my downtime to help me process, ponder and speculate. In the grand scheme of things, he uses the storm to let me know he's there. He uses the storm to slow me down. He uses the storm to pull me close. When Mark things he's good and has it all figured out, he just lets me know he's in control and his power is displayed in the storm.
So, I'm going to wait this one out in the comfort of a coffee shop. But it's getting late and they are closing soon. Will the downpour be kind and stop in the next few minutes? Will I be a soaking mess when I reach home tonight? There's no way to possibly know when it will stop. But I will see the sun again. He promised me that.
The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
Psalm 9:9
